Day 1063

Was very glad to see another dawn: thanks to all concerned. Symptoms returned, but I knocked off the Stemetil and went gingerly into town. Was attacked by appalling anxiety as soon as I got back: used the paper bag hyperventilation therapy to good effect. Rang the Samaritans; described my symptoms and situation at length. I said I was anxious and needed to talk to someone to take my mind off it. She said not to worry about going to the doctor again and to take a written list of my symptoms. Also to do voluntary work, which I've been considering and was trying to look up in the library in the morning. All good advice. Accordingly made an appointment and produced a list.

Got through the day, feeling worst at 2.30 and 8.30. Rang T at 7pm; she was most sympathetic and supportive, and said I could ring her at any time even during the night - such thoughtfulness. T is a good friend to have - funny how things turn out eh, lucky we didn't argue permanently. Else where would I be now? For which much thanks.

Used a little wine for my stomach's sake. It's the only thing that can counteract the anxiety in my experience.