Day 1361

Spent most of the day anticipating the party. Tidied up the room. Got a lift from C at 7.10 in a very foggy night. Talked to Natalie, located myself in the social situation. Lots of people came, including three from the course.

Natlie mentioned that before she went out with her boyfriend she had a girlfriend! 'Er - good for you, I say' I said. But what a surprise! She said it could only be good, because it increased the number of potential partners.

By 1.30 I was drunken over my might, and having run out of drink ate the special confectionery Una gave me last time I was at T's. This was a mistake - I had a spinning head for about an hour. Luckily the relaxant effect worked and about 3am I passed out, apparently, upright on the settee. Natalie woke me up at 3.55 and guided me to a shakedown, after which I knew no more until...

Day 1360

Didn't get up till 10.52, somewhat lazily. Rang the library to renew the X-Windows book, then rang Natalie and heard a characteristically extrovert tape exhorting callers to 'leave us lots of lovely messages'. Left a message beginning: 'This is a lovely message from J...

Didn't win the Lottery, again. Lot of sound and fury about that Emma Nicholson tory defecting to the Liberals. (Major down to +5, counting Richard Body and with two by-elections pending) There were none of these defections before the last election!

Day 1359

Solved the expression evaluator problem last night, was typing it in in the morning when M rang, asking questions about Linux. Took my book round, ended up driving up to Dulchester to go to the PC World. Got a big HTML book at 10% off for the studies assignment.

Borrowed M's MIDI sequencer - excellent. Used it all afternoon, went back to M's at 6 for a big curry. Watched Alan Partridge's Christmas special.

The snow that fell on Boxing Day evening is still lying - very cold, about -5°C, ever since then, though it warmed up to -1°C this afternoon.

Day 1358

Read more of Software Engineering - a very boring book. Messed about with expression evaluators all day - now I understand the recursive method I quite like it, but I still think the operator-stack method is more elegant. Made some progress anyway.

Downloaded a crippled versh of a sequencer - quite good. Rang M and left a message asking if I could come and look at the sequencer prog she bought.

Felt a bit tired and nervous due to all the Christmas drink. Nearly decided not to go to Natalie's party but decided it would be useful on the course-social front. Hope it turns out OK.

Day 1357

C asked me to get him a printer ribbon, took the opportunity to put a Christmas cheque in the building society.

Worked on a logic parser (project idea) in the afternoon, read Software Engineering, took the ribbon round to C's and played darts with him.

In the evening round to M & E's. M's brother was there and we recalled my New Year party at the end of 1986 at great length.

Was invited back for Friday!

Day 1356

BOXING DAY. Fairly standard Boxing Day. Snow in the evening. Went out in the morning to buy a lockable box.

Got a bit of post-Christmas flatness, but a bit lifted by new Hancock tapes and planning for the new year party.

Day 1355

CHRISTMAS DAY. Up about 9.30, went round to my parents'. Got the X Files Companion and a Latin poetry book. Also Red Dwarf out-takes video and the Dubstar CD. The presents I gave them were much appreciated too.

Day 1354

Went up to the newsagent for double Rizla supplies. Bit strange Christmas Eve being a Sunday, what with the Sunday papers etc.

Borrowed mum's car and went out for a drive round the country lanes. Enjoyed the general ambience of Christmas Eve. Taped a lot of Christmas telly.

Well: Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night!

Day 1353

D took a long time to wake up so I watched telly till she did at 11 am. We left about one. She really likes it in Eastern Europe.

I was very anxious on the way home but it was all due to the drink, so, knowing the cause, I felt better.

S rang up after tea and at 8.30 she and her fiancé came round. We went to the Hare and Hounds near Great Saffield - very good. Had an extensive conversation about everything, more or less.

Day 1352

Got the 1424 with no ticket trouble. At T's, gave her her present, which she liked, and she gave me a piece of rose quartz crystal (like in The Grey Prince) which apparently brings luck in love.

D turned up and we we went to the pub for a couple of pints, then back to T's for a big buffet spread and loads of wine. Una was there too, a good time was had by all - we watched the ep of Red Dwarf where they appear to discover they've been playing a computer game for 5 years. Excellent time.

Day 1351

Borrowed mum's car and went to Dulchester in easy stages (stopped to roll a fag at Siding Hay). Got sidetracked into trying to make the lab PC mount the network drive. After lunch went back to the lab and found how to make the Sun prompt show the current directory: you alias cd to change the environment variable prompt to the contents of the environment variable that stores the current directory. So I sorted that at last.

Got off campus about 1.35, drove into Dulchester and checked the location of Natalie's house for the party, home by 2.30.

M phoned, and as I still had the car I gave her a lift to the sorting office so she could post Christmas cards, then to Sainsbury's where she bought turkey, sprouts, and all the appropriate stuff. Didn't realise how expensive Christmas was! M said something rather touching, when I confirmed I planned to go to Natalie's party: 'New Year'll be a bit boring without you around'.

Came back, made cheese straws for tomorrow, shaved, out again to M's in a damp, misty evening. Watched Carry On Columbus and talked. I suggested (and M agreed) that in recent years we'd had much better times on New Year's Day than on its eve.

Left at eleven, came home and spent a long time replying to two e-mails from T. Oddly she used the same 'Why thank you, kind lady' phrase that Natalie did in her last message.

Day 1350

At home today - found it rather strange after all that work. Typed up some X-Windows notes, read Software Engineering. Rationalised the souvenirs files to Pre Lowlands, Lowlands, Post Lowlands and Effolk..

A disturbing e-mail from T about insecure e-mail at her end. Someone had seen it being printed. I never thought they had networked printing! All odd stuff goes by surface mail from now on.

Venus observed in the evening.

Day 1349

A good day. Up at nine, in by 10.20. I was in the lab when in walked Natalie. 'Aren't you ever going home?' she asked. When she'd gone I e-mailed her to explain why I might not make it to her party. Then I went off to have some dinner and then to the bar for a Citrus Spring.

Later on xbiff went off with an e-mail from N. saying '...there's always the couch'. I thanked her gratefully. Not bad considering she didn't know me very well.

I walked along the corridors and to the library thinking 'Yes!' Got Tacitus in translation and a Latin syntax.

When I got to the edge of campus on the bus, it was as though a strong, young spring sun had shone through the grey winter skies to illuminate with vernal warmth the nondescript industrial purlieus and misty estuary valley.

Home by four at a bit of a loose end, because I'd finished the science exercise while I'd been agonising over the party. Fear must've sharpened my wits.

E-mail from T replying to my request for speculation on why men seem to've stopped fancying me. She said I 'scuttled about as if no-one should notice me'. That's accurate enough - it's a defence mechanism, and it works, but obviously it makes me invisible to good men as well as aggressors.

So New Year's sorted, eh? I've certainly worked on it. And quickly too; only a week ago now we were having the course party.

Day 1348

Up at ten, at campus by 12.30. Got the greater part of the science exercises done. Had an e-mail from Natalie saying she'd be pleased to see me at the party.

Left at 2.55, got T's present in Past Times, caught the 1551, home by 4.35. Printed out all her e-mails since October - 34 pages.

Watched the X-Files - End Game pt. 2. Very good. I'd had another e-mail from T to say to ring her after it, so I did; talked to her for 45 minutes. We discussed plans for Friday (meet her under the departure board at Liverpool St. at 3.15pm). I must make some cheese straws.

The Communists have won the parliamentary election in Russia. Be great if they could put principle into practice properly this time.

Last cross-Dulchester bus odyssey tomorrow.

Day 1347

Worked hard on the recursive directory lister I thought up in the studies on Tuesday. I got the principle right but kept running out of stack and heap space (20 levels of recursion).

Tidied up and vacuumed the room. Watched the tornado programme again.

Day 1346

Woken up by M on the phone. She had the cheek to ask why I was still in bed at 10am on Saturday. Cycled round at two; walked into town with her so she could buy E's Christmas present. Met Mum in Marks & Spencers and we got a lift to her house. Then I borrowed her car and gave M a lift to her mum's to pick up her Christmas decorations. I drove back to my parents' house and M followed in her mother's car to give me a lift to hers so I could pick up my bike. As I said, it was like the wolf, goat and cabbage problem.

Stayed for an hour talking to them both and drinking Scotch and having a great time.

Eventually got home about seven, had something to eat.Noticed how Jude, the nurse in Casualty with the disfiguring nose-ring, resembles Natalie. E-mailed the latter to say I'd come to her New Year party, transport permitting. (Fishing for an invitation to stay there).

S rang to say, 'let's have a drink at the Cricketers', had a great time discussing politics and justice. Lucky I got out that extra tenner yesterday!

Busy day for a Saturday.

Day 1345

E-mail from Natalie to say her party invitation was genuine. Transport back will be difficult but I'd like to go.

Went to the science; my supervisor said it was traditional for us to buy him a drink at that point but he had a previous engagement. He warned us not to do no work during the holidays.

Rather poor attendance for the software engineering, about 20 people. He wished us Merry Christmas too. I did think of having a celebratory half before it but it took so long to find someone to hand my access fund form in to that I lost interest..

Started Herodotus again, always a good yarn - very good reading by John Tusa, newsreader and historian, on R4 last year. Also read a bit of Room of One's Own to get some perspective. I like to think I'm approaching the subject in a spirit of scientific enquiry. Gradually, out of the mists, truth is becoming clear, but it's a slow process. I should've learnt all this stuff years ago were it not for certain dodgy educational decisions not made by me.

Feel like I'm in a new age. It's been a hell of a transition from anxiety/unemployment. Roll on.

Day 1344

Two of the lecturers wished us a happy Christmas. Looked over my science assignment: got 43/50 (86%) which isn't bad for an arts/social science exile. And I got 'Good' at the bottom (!).

Got The Twelve Caesars and two parts of the elder Pliny out of the libe. It hadn't been borrowed since 1985. No-one's opened those books except me, since the day I got my first Christmas card from Amy Allott 11 years 1 day ago.

Came home via Andy's Records to check the title of the Dubstar album with Just A Girl on it which I want for Christmas - Disgraceful.

Day 1343

Yesterday: got an e-mail about the course party, decided to go. Had 3 pints beforehand to fortify myself, got the bus down to the wine bar. We got on famously and slagged off various people. Natalie invited us to her New Year party, going so far as to tell me her address. Slept in someone's front room.

Today: woke up at 10.30 am, big hangover. Thanked them for putting me up, walked to campus. Read my e-mail; felt anxious, as usual after drinking loads. But I knew it would pass off and it did about 8pm, after I got home and played lots of Battlezone

I might go to Natalie's party, especially if the Green Man is the alternative. I haven't been to a party for years, since Feb. 1993 in fact. Gosh.

Day 1341

Must've forgotten to write yesterday. I got sick of my assignments hanging about and printed them out.

Today: handed in all 3 assignments. Hung about in the afternoon waiting for my supervisor to put the new rules and exercises on disc. He didn't, so I familiarised myself with lex - quite good.

Back from the station in 21½ minutes (record (!)) by marching and taking long strides. (I seem to be a bit fat so I need aerobic exercise).

Watched The X Files - Colony, very good, Mulder's sister Samantha appeared to return.

Hey, I hope the assignments are good enough. I spent long enough working on the f'ers after all.

Day 1339

After triffic R4 play Tunes of Glory went to Currys, Comet, Do It All before making an uncharacteristic late-afternoon (4.45pm) visit to town, where I got a 128K RAM disc from Silica for the Psion and a load of recycled copier paper from Office World to print out the science assignment.

Started writing a Psion prog to display a Data file as a table. Worked on the engineering- harder than I thought. In the evening that odd versh of Journey To The Centre of the Earth was on R4 again. Copied the good bits of the Derek and Clive tape

Now that play about Léon-Castile and the mules is on the World Service. Plenty of plays today.

Day 1338

Got a load of Psion documents (file formats etc) which will be very useful. Saw my supervisor and borrowed his compiler book as promised; with much relief got the 1626 home.

Rang T after tea and had a good talk. When I finished talking to her rang M, went round and had a great time. Borrowed E's Pete'n'Dud tape.

Today, as if an opposite to yesterday, has gone well at almost every turn. You can't beat an evening with M and E to lift your spirits.

Day 1337

Same DOW as 1989 and the massacre. Everything I did today went wrong, almost, to paraphrase Aragorn. Train 23 minutes late at Dulchester; at this point it started snowing again. Took an ill-fated short cut (which made a long delay) along the river. Missed the studies lecture.

A Z class at 4pm was unexpectedly announced, leaving me to hang around for four hours. That wasn't all bad as the snow had become thick and soft. People were having snowball fights and building snowmen. (Like Feb. 1991 at Lowlands).

4 people turned up for the class. Felt I deserved a drink after all that, had one in the main bar and two in the union bar.

Walked to the station along the footpath over the fields in the snow - a white-out with reflections. It was like the Zero Room, I expected to come out purged.

Eventually caught the 7.21 home.

An e-mail from T asking me to phone her and reverse the charges. I need to spend time with people whose lives aren't as chance-driven as T's.

Blimey what a day.

Day 1336

Woke up at 10.30, caught the 1149, got to campus about ten to one. Dealt with my e-mail, worked through a B+ tree example in the library. Got the 2.35 bus, listened to two girls talking about their 'dizzy' friend Lizzie. Bus fuller than usual due to Admissions day.

Home by four, glad to get out of the cold - fine snow falling all day but no increase in depth. M rang and came round to borrow my Access users' guide.

I've been at Effolk 2 months now. I think on the whole I'm holding everything together and it's going well enough. I've got a crazy teacher, but he doesn't wear dark glasses.

Day 1335

Snow shower about 9.10; walking to the station passed a bloke who said 'Winter's begun eh?'

On the train, more snow; sunshine at Dulchester.

Started snowing again at twelve just before the studies lecture; after the databases (2-3pm) it was clear it had started again and it didn't stop till about seven. Everyone was huddled in the bus shelter when I left, and at Dulchester the wind was driving copious snow. When a fast train came through there were clouds of snow-spray. So it's snow before Christmas, and during the day, for the first time since 1981 as far as I can remember.

Got home, printed out the OPL prog I've perfected as work for the engineering assignment; broke my Battlezone record with 160,000.

Day 1334

Very cold east wind. My supervisor was off sick and the lab terminals were down. Handed in my exam form, there was nothing else to do so got the 10.55 back. Walked round town looking for something nice to buy, settled for the Sherlock Holmes novels in one volume for £2 from Woolworths. Got the bus home since I'd walked over 4 miles already.

Worked all afternoon on the science and engineering assignments. Harrowing e-mail from T about her boyfriend.

Great R4 play in the afternoon, Emily's Ghost, about two girls who, unhappy in 1909 and 1995, having the same birthday swap places in time. Charming stuff.

Watched The X-Files. Snow forecast for tomorrow.

Day 1333

Got the program for the science assignment written; later wrote a Psion prog for the engineering assignment. Watched Ipswich v. Wolves on the telly.

Apparently it'll be very cold this week - might get some snow. Should be interesting but I hope it doesn't fuck the trains up.

Day 1332

Went into town for the library, got a wargames campaign book, looked in at Games Workshop - all Warhammer models, very poor.

My 80's CDs from the book club arrived, started listening to them.

In the afternoon got another exercise question done while listening to The Distance Between Stars on R4, the play about the teenagers who steal a hearse and go to Scotland to see supposed aliens land. Then worked on the engineering and science assignments.

In the evening to the Crown with M & E and S and her fiancé.

Day 1331

Before the engineering lecture listened to Loquax and his mates talking about being scared of my supervisor; during the lecture watched them playing hangman. (The lecturer was the nervous woman who talks like Polly from Fawlty Towers.) All the MSc's have gravitated to the front - probably because of the high noise level.

Was all ready to catch the 2.15 when I realised I'd left the rizlas T gave me in the lab foyer when I was talking to Serius about C; went back to get them as I felt it would break my 'departure worry' habit. Got 'em, home via 2.25/walk/1507; collected Return of the Shadow from the libe. Very cold, dark, grey day.

Home just after four: worked out the answer to the recursive readint exercise I've been turning over since Monday. Must say I'm glad to've got to Friday - and to've worked out that exercise.

Got the advent calendar out. 24 days to Christmas!

Day 1330

Went through the 3 hours of lectures, caught the 12.35 bus back. Home via the library: intended to get The Return of the Shadow but forgot my ticket; the woman kindly offered to put it by for me.

Went to the bank to apply for a credit card: spoke to the same woman I did when I applied for the cheque guarantee card. I could've had a £600 overdraft, a £249/month personal loan or a £1500 limit credit card! Declined the latter for £500, the lowest they've got and much less than I could comfortably pay off even were I back on the dole (Goddess forbid).

Walked home by three, spent the afternoon putting my databases assignment together. Got it finished - yes! Can do the engineering over the weekend. So I'm managing to hold everything together.

Day 1329

Did solid work running the INGRES assignment queries and making .PS screen dumps to put on disc. Collected a project options form, got the 2.25 bus, caught the 1507, home by four.

Tested putting the .PS files into the Word document I've got my assignment on - used Corel PhotoPaint to convert them to .PCX, with good results.

Watched Star Trek: TNG - good multi-layered delusions (Frame of Mind). Finished OHB.

I have developed a Jobcentre-queue type irritation with the overcrowding at Effolk. What is the positive response? A better view of the workload might help; there's the database and software engineering assignments by the end of Week 9 (this is Week 7), the science assignment and the concomitant exercises.

Day 1328

Went to the studies lecture. Wish he wouldn't let Gollum ask such stupid, irrelevant questions; last week I heard the bloke next to me whisper 'Oh, shut up' when he asked one.

The database lecture was cancelled, so I made some assignment notes in the library and went home (1.35/1407/about three). Typed out a template for the assignment with spaces for screen dumps that I'll make tomorrow. Got quite a lot of work done actually.

Carried on with Of Human Bondage, found it so interesting that I put off starting drinking ½ hour.

Budget today (stupid time of year to have it): nothing on beer, wine or hand-rolling baccy. 1p off tax - surely that isn't enough of a bribe with a maximum of 18 months before the election (equivalent of Oct. 1990)? According to the Guardian John Arse Major's been prime minister for five years today - seems like five hundred. Hurry up Tony, come on...

Day 1327

Got to campus about 10.20, sorted out my e-mail. Went to the lecture; explaining factorials to the others, he said they'd've encountered them if they'd ever put on a Yankee or any other multiple bet.

After lunch went to the class; made good progress with the new recursion exercises, as my supervisor told me. Home by about 4.35. Made X Windows notes, e-mailed T, watched a good but eerie X-Files.

Carried on with Of Human Bondage. Must make some notes for the database assignment tomorrow.

Day 1326

Left about 1.20. Got to Liverpool St at 2.10, read Viz till the train went at three. Home just after four, read Of Human Bondage . Went out for a spin in C's new company car.

Day 1325

Was surprised to sleep without interruption till after twelve. Read the paper till 2.30 when T got up. She went out to shop for various things and I did a first draft of the sotware engineering assignment.

When she got back we had a big meal and watched telly and X-Files videos till 2.30am.

Day 1324

Got to T's before five. We had a good conversation and agreed that since I've got studying to do the two-day visits take up too much of the weekend. Sorted out her telly reception instantly by estimating the direction of Crystal Palace. Went to bed at 3.30.

Day 1323

Got to campus about 8.20. Exchanged frank but friendly e-mails with T while cleaning up the two-day backlog. Found staying awake in the lectures rather hard but got through to noon; after dinner put in 90 minutes' solid work on the INGRES 4GL exercise. Very much like Visual languages but worth the practice.

Day 1322

Beginning to get back on the course track. Went to the doctor: he listened to one respiration and prescribed antibiotics and steroid inhalers. The former made me a bit queasy but they are working.

Read 2 chapters of the Software Engineering book.

Day 1321

Stayed at home recovering. Found I could ward off the cold feeling with paracetamol.

Had an irritating e-mail from T to the effect she'd run out of cash and would I come and see her? She rang up and we discussed it. Actually the £13 my tickets'll cost is probably about the same as meals and drinks had she come here. I'll miss a bit of reading time but T suggested I take the book with me. She promised to come and visit me twice in a row to make up, but we'll see whether that happens or not.

Sent the database lecturer an e-mail about his lab; he replied that he didn't make any announcements.

Day 1320

Had a terrible night; kept dreaming the same bit of dream about INGRES over and over again. Eventually dropped off about 4 am, after the heat subsided and I started sweating.

Felt better when I woke up at eight; got a lift from C as I didn't fancy walking to the station in the cold.

Got a spot of work done, made 75 minutes in all. About two started shivering again, got the bus home from the station. Took to my bed four till seven after attempting to do that job enquiry for M - they wouldn't give away any info. While I was watching The X-Files she came round and borrowed my serial cable.

Day 1319

Wrote copious notes about views. Went round to M's to borrow E's SQL book; he also lent me a 4GL manual. Had tea & talk with both of them.

Felt a bit achy and cold in the evening, as if with flu, but not sick or feverish (yet). Hopefully tomorrow's lectures won't be disrupted.

Day 1318

Did my Christmas shopping. Spent nearly £25 - it's getting a very expensive festival. Got a very useful INGRES book from the library.

Spent a peaceful afternoon getting away from the course for a few hours. Watched the first Coogan's Run I taped last night - Get Calf. Quite clever.

Went on Compuserve and downloaded some great Psion stuff - a brilliant version of FORTH outstanding.

Listened to amusing J.B. Priestley R4 play When We Are Married.

Day 1317

Worked on my new improved quote and comment-aware FSA C token getter. Caught the bus home with about 1-3 seconds to spare, and the train with 5-10 seconds to spare. Home by 5.40.

About eight M rang with some complicated story about wanting me to ring up some job ad to see if it was placed by her company. Went round for Blake's Seven, spent a very pleasant evening discussing INGRES and WWW. I could hardly tear myself away.

Well cold today - 5°C, -½°C at 6.30pm. It snowed for a bit about 8.40 - the earliest I can remember. I said we were in for a harsh winter last month when I saw the quantity of berries on the pyrocanthus and acorns on the oaks. I had to dig out my Lowlands scarf for the walk to M's.

Day 1316

Up at six, got a lift at 6.50, got the 0706. 0748 bus, campus at 8.14. Not bad going. Guts played up a bit but everything went well. Got to the lecture on time.

in the afternoon got some more solid working and reading done. Improved my WWW pages.
Home about 5.15. Taped a Young Ones ep which I found out about from a WWW page which gives personalised telly listings.

Day 1315

When I got to Dulchester the weather had changed, much colder and clearer. And the Sun came out for the first time in a long time. Cheered by this, got some solid work in; INGRES and .HTML and C shell scripts (batch files). Did some Elmasri reading.

All in all was on campus for six hours; home by five. More dbase work. Had an e-mail from T postponing the weekend.

Going to get the 0706 tomorrow, but not get up any earlier, so I'll have to move fast. I'm sick of being late on Thursdays.

All in all I think I've got the course bedded in. It's nearly six weeks now and that's a significant point. A hope undeferred for a change. Got to keep putting effort into it though.

Day 1314

Back in touch with T - she's got her MA result.

After the database lecture hurried to the lab for the class. Got an hour's solid INGRES done, had a few laughs over the crap instructions.

In the evening learnt by example the HTML script. Very easy to get impressive results. Our assignment for the studies course is to design our own WWW pages. That will be fun.

Watched The Thin Blue Line which I taped yesterday; Rowan Atkinson's new thing. I could only stand the first 5 minutes. Like a horrible cross between Blackadder and Bean.

Day 1313

Got some solid software engineering notes reading done in the library, at last, and went to hear Jeremy Corbyn speak. Except he didn't turn up (his train was delayed) so I went back in the bar. Back at eleven, watched (taped) X-Files.

Day 1312

Wrote a C token extractor, as a preamble to the C violation detector. Used that finite-state stuff I learnt in the first year at Lowlands. Now I reckon I should write a FSA interpreter - I could change the grammar then without changing the code.

Did the assignment - think I've sorted out the maths 'proof' element.

Day 1311

Woke up just before eleven with a hangover - what a night out that was. Went to the library; renewed the Software Engineering book, got another about mathematical proofs, and the computer ephemeris book. (It had a renewal date in the front in my writing from 3½ years ago).

Went out again in the afternoon; got shelving materials and Christmas cake ingredients. Made the cake; put the shelves up. Made a good job of both. With the four extra shelves I managed to get a lot of tidying up done; nice to have a clear floor again. While I was doing it, listened to sad R4 play Body Language.

Drew up a FSA state diagram to base my C syntax violation detector on. Will start implementing it tomorrow.

Day 1310

Having discarded the Prolog found things much easier. Had a conversation with the serious oldish bloke with the briefcase about the drinks machine's user interface.

Software engineering lecture rather uninteresting - what is the point of these slide-based lectures, there's no real opportunity to make notes or anything!

To the Crown in the evening with S, met M and E and had a great time.

Day 1309

Up at 6am, off at seven; had a terrible long wait for a bus. I was 10 minutes late for the lecture but it didn't matter. The other lecs were rather boring; afterwards posted the letter to D I wrote last night. Got a lot of practice done in the lab.

Natalie's friend got on the bus back and we had a long talk about the course all the way to the station. He and N and some others were at Effolk last year.

Gave C his Kenneth Williams diaries present. KW's problem was that in many directions he wasn't happy with what he was. The secret of life I think is to be happy with what you are; if you aren't, change it.

Day 1308

After a long delay got to campus at 12.30. I've resolved to always stay at least three hours from now on; got the C exercises finished. If I see 'Segmentation Fault' one more time I'm going to be cross.

Day 1307

Owing to train delays got to campus too late for the Prolog, so decided to stop going. I think I've learnt enough about Prolog. Got the ephemeris working in the lab.

Had a good talk with my adviser after his lecture. He asked me how things were going

Vintage London Pris tonight owing to sport on Anglia.

Day 1306

The lecturer turned up late again. I bet he'll do it on Thursday too; so it'll be hard to find anywhere to sit in the next lecture. Had and replied to an e-mail from T - nice to be in contact in my somewhat isolated Effolk situation.

Worked very hard in the lab on the ephemeris, bunging in tons of trace statements to track the errors. You can't have a sun function, so I changed it to haul.

Oh dear, in the seminar we had to do maths proofs. I never could stand that stuff. Suppose I can manage it though.

I've been on the course a month today; as usual it simultaneously seems to've been going on ten minutes and ten years.

Day 1305

Worked hard on my C ephemeris. Had some trouble with the maths library but solved it indirectly by referring to the UNIX notes. It works, but Pluto is 10° out. Why? I'll work on it tomorrow in the lab.

Day 1304

Went into town by bike. Got the Kenneth Williams diaries for C's birthday present, and an X-Windows book from the libe.

In the afternoon listened to a version of Shane on R4; very good. Read some of the KW diaries - amusing in bits but pretty depressing on the whole.

Was invited round to M's: looked at OS/2, which is very good and can run Windows progs in separate windows. On the way fireworks were going off everywhere, like the descriptions of Gandalf's pyrotechnics in The Hobbit.

Am still plodding on with the C ephemeris. Bloody hard work!

Day 1303

Still very cold. A couple of e-mails from T had arrived on campus - cheered me. Found the I'm in control mantra extremely helpful. You have to take some responsibility in this life.

Went to the lectures, listened to the others talk. You never know with this sort of situation, there may well be a way across despite my social ineptitude.

Walking back from the station I stopped outside Jim Bob's, where T wants to eat, to scan their menu. Almost all their vegetarian stuff is rather insistently Mexican.

Started the long job of writing a C versh of my astrological ephemeris prog. After converting the original BASIC2 version to Pascal, OPL and QBASIC, it's a task I'm fairly used to, but it'll be a long job, as I said.

Day 1302

Spent hours in the lab failing to get the UNIX prompt to show the correct directory. Home by three, practised some of the unfamiliar but very handy UNIX commands.

Had a nice e-mail from T re her planned visit on the 18th. She wants to have a meal at Jim Bob's, where we went for a drink on my birthday pub crawl. After the success of our Pizzaland visit in September I think it's a good idea.

Made another advance in the anti-anxiety campaign: a lot of the things I worry about are losses of control - running amok, flipping out etc. But perhaps the basic prob is that evading responsibility has caused me to fear I'm not controlling my own direction.

Day 1301

Put in some work in the lab, wrestling with getting the shell prompt to display the working directory. Went in the libe and made ANSI C notes, found a copy of the student paper in the coffee shop and read about last week's raping and groping incidents. Can't say I noticed any 'tension' on campus.

Bought the Elmasri book; £25.95, ouch.

Day 1300

In for ten. Did some C notes in the libe. Had a Computer Ethics lecture.

This is the end of Volume Thirteen of this diary; from the start of hope in February to hope now. I planned for my New Day and came through the night to it.

Day 1299

Didn't wake up till 10.30; decided to stay at home and do the ANSI C reading. Got through 2½ chapters so did pretty well. Went into town in the afternoon to the library and to get some file dividers.

Worked on my WHERAMI C prog, which works out what directory a prog's been run from by examining PATH. Went well.

Read The Hobbit again - found some good parallels between Bilbo and me; 'This is the story of how a Baggins had an adventure, and found herself doing and saying things altogether unexpected.'

Back to Effolk tomorrow. This effective 3-day break has done me good. Tried to ring T but she wasn't in. I'll send her an e-mail tomorrow evening, she can read it when she gets back to work on Wednesday.

Day 1298

Woke up at 7am when they came back. Talked to T till Star Trek - the 2nd ep ever - came on. Left about 1.10, engineering on the railway, home just after four. I had some of the usual anxiety on the journey but I rose above it and did quite well.

It was a good visit but there are forward moves I could make, like knocking off the diffidence a bit. All in good time.

Day 1297

Woke up at eight and read Complicity (not bad but typical Iain Banks Aren't-I-clever stuff) waiting for everyone to wake up. Went to the pub with T, then all her friends came round and they all made ready for their rave.

They went at ten and I had a lot of wine and watched the first four X-Files, all in a row. Went to bed at 1.30.

Day 1296

Got away early enough to get the 1451. Got to Mugsborough at 1507, got a ticket, got the 1524 on to London.

I was coming out of the station about 4.30 when I ran into T coming back from Sainsbury's. Had her to myself till six; then Una came round, and also B, who I think I used to know through Richie at Lowlands. Everyone was smoking blow and I thought 'In for a penny, in for a pound' and joined in. Nothing untoward happened.

Day 1295

Up at six, to campus for nine - 3 hours' solid lectures. I had to sit on the floor for the second till someone kindly moved up.

Interesting email from Natalie. In some ways I think my silence and diffidence are as much an affectation as her bright colours and noise.

Left just after one, got the 1351, full to the gunwales. Had to stand up all the way, but we made it non-stop in 16 minutes flat.

Tidied up, made all ready for the trip tomorrow.

Day 1294

Borrowed mum's car and drove to Dulchester. It took a whole hour, and was much more frustrating than going by train. I'll carry on letting the train take the strain, I think.

Did some UNIX practice, got an Access Fund form; came back at two via Sainsburys and the doctors. I couldn't get an appointment till next Wednesday; still that'll give any chest infection a chance to develop, or disappear.

Rang up T re her e-mail, had a good talk.

Day 1293

Lectures etc.

Got an e-mail from T - she wants to go to a rave on Saturday, so I could experience Loved Up at first hand. Or rather she's going anyway and offered me to stay in with the cats if I didn't fancy it. I think I'll do the latter.

Day 1292

Put in some solid work in the lab, on TODO and a UNIX script (batch file) exercise.

Got the 1351 and got back to Mugsborough at 1407 - 16 minutes for 25 miles - very good.

Got £25 out of the building society for Friday (the £13 for fares can come out of the bank), went to Boots for Vitamin C and paracetamol. Came home and nursed my cold. Got some database notes done too.

Had a double Scotch during The X-Files to ease symptoms.

Day 1291

Worked hard on my TODO Schedule Scanner. Got it working very well. Read Rocannon's World, made lots of database notes.

No computer science lecture tomorrow, so I can go in in my own time and potter about in the lab. Tomorrow is the 12th working day of the new dispensation; if I last it out it makes it more successful than ABC. It already seems like 500 years since the course began. Really I'm doing very well, all the travel and work are quite manageable.

Day 1290

Went into town; renewed Rocannon's World, and got an earlier edition of the software engineering book.

Worked on my TODO program, adding an insertion sort to order the events and suppressing the printing of buses that go before the last lecture finished. I'm quite pleased with it so far.

It was a quiet day otherwise. Started composing a reply to T's e-mail.

Day 1289

Got in for the Prolog lecture. Worked on TODO afterwards.

In the evening went up to the Crown with M and S, had a very deep conversation. Philosophy, religion, science, it was all grist to the mill. A deeper conversation I cannot recall, certainly adds a dimension to them both.

Walked back under enormous stars, Vega and Deneb very bright and Orion coming up sideways in the North.

When I got back I couldn't drink any more. Listened to the radio instead. There was a girl who'd fought to be allowed to sing at Winchester Cathedral. She said it was a big step forward for girlkind. Blimey!

Day 1288

Did some UNIX pottering, got the careers thing E wanted. Got the 1.35 bus back, got the fast train, home by 2.35.

Wrote some Elmasri notes - first work I've done at home. M looked at them when she came round to get the careers thing.

Day 1287

Took the Giro to the building society, then caught the 11.10. Worked on the TODO prog I conceived yesterday. Started sitting on the non-smoking side of the coffee shop; it's good self-denial.

Looked up the name T mentioned in her e-mail, in Who Was Who in America. He was director at Mt. Wilson 1903-1924. Sent her the details.

Made good progress on TODO, learnt about UNIX in the process (so it counts as work). Managed to transfer the files to floppy disc to bring home.

Got the 3.35 bus, home at five. More TODO.

Day 1286

Went to the Prolog lecture. Had a terrible database 'class' (=seminar) in the afternoon, by a foreign PhD student; didn't learn much but I've got the hang of the relational idea.

Got the 4.35 bus, back in Mugsborough by 5.39. Very quiet journey.

Watched Is It Legal? again - really quite good.

Had a great idea for a mighty prog to run on the lab machines and tell me when the next bus or lecture is, using a weekly data file. I'll start it tomorrow: no lectures so a leisurely trip.

Got the final Giro of my 4-year DHSS 'course'. £86 of that will go in the building society.

Day 1285

Train a bit late due to a broken-down train at Ingham. A London train came in to the Dulchester platform. Anyway, I was there well on time.

There was a 'lab' in the afternoon, I wasn't sure quite what we were supposed to do so I went through the C exercise I'd printed out in the morning. There was bad overcrowding too, I couldn't get a terminal for 45 minutes so I went to the libe.

In the evening managed to FTP to Effolk; the correct name is helios1.effolk.ac.uk. Watched a very good X-Files - Scully is back.

Day 1284

Installed C, C++, perl, LISP etc onto LINUX, also EMACS. I might get into LISP if I have time.

In the evening I intended to do some work but could find nothing to do. I'll just concentrate on getting to Effolk for 10 am to pick up the UNIX notes.

Day 1283

Went round to M's to collect the Linux book and CD, had a spot of breakfast there. Went into town for a new watch and new diary book; came back and spent most of the day getting Linux to work. Finally did it about 6pm.

Curry in the evening with M, E and Jo Jones. Walked home through the fog feeling pretty positive.

Day 1282

Went to the Prolog lecture, just out of interest. The Software Engineering one was packed out so he cancelled the lecture. If this keeps happening I'm going to claim some money back. It's bad enough having to sit with a load of pig-like second years as it is.

Went home early, and got an earlier edition of the very hard to find Database book from the Mugsborough library stacks.

When I got back I remembered something someone said in the lecture about Public Domain Prolog: got onto Compuserve, went to the IBM File Finder, found it, downloaded it, plus ARC.EXE to dezip the documentation. IBMFF is worth its weight in gold.

M came round briefly about 9.40 to borrow my Compuserve and said she'd lend me the Linux CD tomorrow. (Be excellent UNIX practice).

Think I'll have a few now.

Day 1281

Saw the loco University of Lowlands zap past on its way to Eastchester while I was waiting at the station in the morning. Last time I saw it I was coming out of the Jobcentre. Tempora mutantur, nos et mutamur in illis.

The bus was well late: just got to campus by nine, but wasted 25 minutes looking for the room. When I found it there were no chairs, and I nearly gave up, but I went out and got one from a corridor and went back in there. I didn't come to Effolk to bottle out. Sent an e-mail to to the lecturer to explain.

There were 2 more lectures in a row, both horribly overcrowded. I really resented it, also having to pay for photocopies of lecture notes. And why is there never anywhere to sit on campus?

An e-mail from T cheered me up; did some more UNIX experiments, got the 2.26 back. Home by four. Sun had shone through the mist by then, which helped.

Rested, did some UNIX reading. Watched DS9, would be no good without Kira. Lots more e-mail from T, printed out everything since Sep. 18.

Day 1280

Lay in till nine, what luxury! Went off in a misty, moisty morning to endure a 30-minute wait at the station. But I made the connection and got to campus by 11.30 or so. Experimented in the lab, wrote a UNIX C dump prog. Got some course books from the libe, also a much-needed UNIX book. Did some more experimenting, got the 2.28 home. Read the UNIX book all the way back to Mugsborough.

After season ticket enquiries at the station, walked home; the Sun was just breaking through the mist.

My blisters are much improved: I wore my white trainers for added comfort.

Day 1279

Up at 6.40, limped to the station, just managed to catch the 8.08. Got to campus surprisingly early at 9.05, did three lectures.

In the Sun lab in the afternoon, started teaching myself UNIX (GNU really, but it's the same). Used the C compiler, did the assignment, which was to e-mail the lecturer. I used the 'Of all the fishes in the sea the mermaid is the one for me' line.

Met the Labour bloke, and discussed forthcoming events. I said I'd attend a few and see whether I wanted to join. Got the 7.33 back.

No Pris, so carried on with The Two Towers with a couple of cans I bought on the way back with Pris in mind. Blisters might just be starting to get better.

Day 1278

Got my options form done after going into Dulchester for a padlock for my graduate locker. Saw a poster for a Labour Club meeting. Decided to go; found myself fired with enthusiasm.

Rang mum to ask her to tape The X-Files. When I bought the phonecard the woman commented humourously on how tired I looked.

Got the 9.26 train back, home at 10.40.

Day 1277

Still quite tired. Revived with the news that a Tory MP had defected to Labour, the first ever to do so directly.

M rang in the morning and came round to have a Compuserve demo. Talked for a bit.

I hope tomorrow goes OK. Got to plough on with it I suppose.

Day 1276

Woke up hungry - didn't eat much yesterday. M rang up to see how positive I was feeling, I said 'quite'. I suppose I must've seemed more agitated than I was, last night.

Scanned through the newsgroups; changed my Compuserve password, worked on a master timetable for getting to Dulchester.

I worked out a lecture timetable too: it's none too heavy, 11 hrs/week, and that's including all modules for the 'sampling period'. I don't know about seminars as they're separate. I'll check on Monday.

Day 1275

Exercise and the walk to the station got rid of my hangover. Got to campus, wandered around a lot looking for the registration place, found it finally. There was some argy-bargy about whether or not Mugsborough was more than 25 miles from Dulchester (it isn't) and then some more about whether I'd paid or not, but I told the bloke I certainly wasn't going home for the receipt and I was duly issued with a registration card.

Half of lager at the union bar £1.17: 'How much?' I asked the woman. 'Is it too expensive or too cheap?' she asked, expecting the latter.

Intro talk at four, then a grim cheese and wine party: I had 3 glasses of white wine on top of the lager and was practically falling over. Various staff members were deputed to come and converse with me; I told them I was quite happy and merely suffering culture shock after being unemployed so long.

Walked down to the station in the windy night. It was deserted; got the 8.33 from there. Walked through rain to M's and then home.

Feel old with tiredness and young with the reminders of events seven years ago. Even the posters brought everything back. I kept expecting everyone from O-Block to walk into the bar.

Day 1274

Lovely weather for the 1,552nd and last day of unemployment. Went shopping, computed, gave The End of the Tour another listen. Into town about 5.35 pm, got the weekly season after some argy-bargy;.

Sent T a scan of the X Files article in the Radio Times I bought last week after the funeral.

Will probably not feel too well tomorrow first thing, but eras have to be ended in style.

Day 1273

Improved my document deleter. 1,551 days of unemployment down, 1 to go.

Day 1272

Looked in at the Jobcentre for the last time, inquired about weekly seasons at the station.

Could find nothing to do in the afternoon. Tony Blair made an excellent Conference speech, quite moving. He invoked the 'white heat of technology' idea like Wilson - Mrs W. was on the platform. Very optimism-inspiring. He said he wanted to rule Britain for a generation and change it for good.

They let O.J. Simpson off. I reckon [redacted] though.

On and off had delicious visions of a prosperous future.

Day 1271

For the last week on the dole I've revised town days to tomorrow and Thursday, so stayed in and arsed about. Listened to some of the Labour conference.

In the evening watched The X-Files. I don't like Scully being mistreated.

Day 1270

October at last! Applied myself gently to VB. Began to feel quite excited about Friday (5 days to go).

Day 1269

Went into town in search of books on OLE and DDE. Came back and worked on OLE and finally produced the Word document deleter/viewer I've been trying to write. VB is very good.

Day 1268

Into town to the bank in the morning; met Rebecca B who had read my letter in the paper about pylon lines.

Day 1267

Seven years since I started at Lowlands. Did VB all morning, read Tehanu, the fourth Earthsea, all afternoon. Different tone but interesting to read. You can always trust Ursula le Guin for some interesting stuff about women.

Cooked tea, watched the pilot of Star Trek: Deep Space Nine. Not bad.

Day 1266

Watched Switch which was triffic. Went to the building society. to pay in my last Giro, then to the station to enquire about cost of fare to nearest stop to Effolk, 30p extra return.

Went for a newsgroup trawl, wrote a VB versh of Poker Solitaire - made surprising progress and got quite carried away. Went out and made some more star sketches.

Having considerable success with, rather than fearing people and situations, instead thinking they can fuck right off if they hinder me. This springs from a month ago at T's where I saw a bloke in the pub sneering at me. Suddenly I thought 'I don't give a toss about you, live or die, or what you think of me'.

Day 1265

Did some more VB (so easy it hardly counts as programming) and rang M re the VC++ stuff before going into town for a new Psion backup battery

Borrowed M's railway timetable, drew up a master scheme for getting to Effolk.

Day 1264

As I was getting ready to go out M rang; she's on holiday for two weeks (perfect timing!) and offered to give me a lift down town. Went and signed on for the last time, I hope; they kept us waiting for ages but it was worth it.

Me and M went round town and decided the best period of similar activity had been early 1992. Inevitably ended up going to PC World where she bought a new hard disc. She lent me Visual Basic (only 3 discs).

Tried VB after tea - very good and well worth it. Had another look round the newsgroups; in future during the week I'm going to ration myself to one a day as the phone bill's expensive.

Watched a scary X-Files, Scully n a frightful pickle at the end - to be continued.

Day 1263

Looked round the newsgroups. Worked a bit more on my Windows file dumper, but after dinner left it to write a phone call cost meter (essential for internet use). Watched Equinox (great title sequence as always) about fires.

'Only a dozen days more'. Last signing-on tomorrow, I hope it is the last. And if it isn't, I hope that horrible free-for-all non-queueing system never comes back.

Day 1262

Smoked tofu (~ bacon) sandwiches for 'brunch'; in the afternoon mowed the lawns; an afternoon very much like a golden Saturday afternoon six years ago today when I moved into the disastrous second-year house. Still, remember the three tenets: 1. Live 2. Love 3. Learn.

Iin the evening watched a triffic Screen Two called Loved Up, about T's music culture. It was extremely brilliant, a Brick Is Beautiful for the 1990's. If there's one thing I love it's a play/novel/film/prog that reproduces something I've experienced.

Day 1261

Into town, jobcentre, library. One of the books I got from the libe reprinted some photos of that Groom Dry Lake place I think The X-Files went to.

Did more VC++.

Got onto the USENET newsgroups on Compuserve - found a lot of stuff on the sauce-filth boundary.

Two weeks to go ('Only a fortnight more' as Henchard said). Worked out the scale on that Dulchester map I bought yesterday.

Day 1260

Went up to Dulchester. Got a street map and a bus timetable, enquired about the bus pass.

Came back, did VC++.

Day 1259

Went into town; got another Kennedy book from the library.

Came back, did some VC++ work - how the hell do you get a window to redraw? Played Battlezone, got pretty good. Did some WWW browsing.

Decided to go to Dulchester tomorrow to sort out bus times and season tickets. I've got to establish how to make that connection on the non-through service.

Effolk getting very close now (16 days). I wish I knew how best to prepare myself. Probly best just to go with the flow.

Day 1258

Worked hard all day on a VC++ file hex dump prog. Played Battlezone; that game really is a joy, I used to love it in the arcade and it's what persuaded me to get MS Arcade. I'd like a second generation, perhaps with Moon Cresta, Galaxians, Phoenix, Frogger, Scramble, Defender, Berserk... all great stuff.

Watched Is It Legal? by the Men Behaving Badly bloke, not bad, above Agony Again but below Chance In A Million.

Day 1257

Damp morning; felt a bit rusty myself, but forced myself to exercise. Read C's new JFK plot book Crossfire.

Went to Thurrock in the afternoon, but the Windows versh of Visual Basic wasn't there; I think all these failed attempts to buy it mean something. And it would be a big duplication of functionality with C++. I must buckle down and work on the latter, perhaps do some of the App Wizard examples in my book.

Instead bought Microsoft Arcade; replicas of Asteroids, Tempest, Battlezone, Centipede and Missile Command for £21 - not bad. That's the last of my tax rebate money.

Came back, played the games, watched The X-Files (X-cellent - I'm really getting into them) and exchanged e-mail with T.

Day 1256

Drove to Harwich in the afternoon with C and looked at the ships, came back via the campus at Dulchester (19 days).

Day 1255

T came. Luckily the heavy rain of the afternoon had stopped. She treated me to a meal at Pizzaland and we walked back to the Crown. About 11 we walked home from there arm-in-arm and talked till about four, when we went to bed.

Day 1254

Got my genealogy database pretty well polished.

Read The Mayor of Casterbridge. 21 years' abstinence! Had a headache again, a bit like the ones I was getting in 1994 when my glasses weren't matching my eyesight. When did I last have new lenses?

Printed out my e-mail from T.

Day 1253

Worked very hard with Access all day, learnt a lot and achieved a lot. Developed an unpleasant cross between a neck-ache and a headache.

E-mailed T a scanned and recognised description of how Brie is made (from the encyclopædia) to settle the rennet question.

Day 1252

Completed the top level of my exercises, with 45 seconds to spare. So I am now at peak fitness! It's taken long enough - 5 months 8 days.

Came back and worked hard on the Access database for family history - made progress. Played more solo Paydirt.

. Scanned the maps out of the back of Unfinished Tales on Monday and printed them out, enlarged to A4, on hex paper. Beautiful campaign maps!

Day 1251

Turned my hand to Access Basic, made some progress with a properly validated genealogical database but raised a lot of new difficulties.

I went to the corner shop for baccy and the bloke asked me if I'd finished university yet! I omitted mention of the past four years and told him I would soon be starting again, on a postgraduate course. I was wrong about people round here looking down on me for being out of work, if he, whose shop I've been in practically every weekday for the last 4 years, didn't know, then who does?

Played another solo game of Paydirt. Sent off the Effolk cheque, also a Softback Preview offer in the morning.

Day 1250

Went into town; signed on for the penultimate time. The book I wanted on Windows file formats was out of the library, unfortunately.

Did a bit more VC++ but couldn't get very far without knowledge of Word file formats. Devised random charts to simulate an opponent in Paydirt; worked quite well, I won 17-7 with the Green Bay Packers vs. the Cleveland Browns.

In the evening,watched The X-Files - not only very good but an excellent anti-imaginary fear device (because its situations are so bizarre as to put things in perspective).

Day 1249

Did a litle VC++, think I need something to freshen my attention before I carry on. Did the personality quiz from that old colour supplement, found my 'happiness' score had gone up 200% since I last did it.

Fried some of the smoked tofu I bought for the stir fry and put it in a sandwich as a bacon substitute. Very good - wish I'd thought of it before.

Day 1248

Did more VC++, improving Worddel v2.

In the evening more sorted out my souvenirs into pre-Lowlands, Lowlands and post-Lowlands; managed to chuck some outdated stuff out. All this computing needs to be leavened with other activities.

Day 1247

Worked on improving Worddel, made progress - I've made a real cognitive leap with VC++.

It occurred to me that since income support is paid in arrears, on Oct. 11th I should get a normal £93 enhanced Giro to spend as I like. That'll be a big help.

Rang M in the evening and left a message on her answering machine re my serial cable. She rang back and we went for a few drinks at the Crown. She went on about how old we were getting and reminisced about the 1984-86 days when we used to meet up on the corner of the street after school.

28 days - four weeks - to go. 4 weeks! It's exciting but just a little bit frightening.

Day 1246

Brought Worddel v1 to a finished versh with some Help, added a Word macro to run it from a menu via the Shell command.

May have succeeded with the 28,800 connection to Compuserve.

Day 1245

Went into town: had another really hard time trying to find something to treat myself to as I decided. So decided to leave it until I could find something I really wanted.

Came back, got the Word file deleter v1 into final form: very good it is too. Did a lot of work on a Word macro to do the same thing using a dynamic dialogue box, but couldn't get certain bits to work, and realised there was no access to file dates and times from WordBasic. (But it's very good; there's even a virus going round written in it. Installing the Help for it was a real investment). I'll settle for a macro to run my Document Deleter.

Watched Star Trek: TNG but turned it off as it got into all that sentient computer bullshit.

Went round and helped C with his new dedicated word processor - very good, it's even got a spreadsheet and a (sort of) database. Afterwards we watched the Smashie & Nicey 'docu'.

Day 1244

Worked very hard all day on a document browser and deleter in VC++, with good results. Also got round to installing WordBasic Help, experimented with that branch of VBA.

Got an alumni magazine from Lowlands today: was the Linsey Baker, deceased in boating accident, the one we lived with in O-block? Pity if it was.

These last few days have gone by quickly and slowly at the same time, if you see what I mean; there are slow bits that seem endless but the days as a whole pass at acceptable speed. Only 31 to go.

Day 1243

Cold and hazy in the morning, very Septembral; sun came out later though for a bit of autumn gold.

Had some success with VC++ using AppWizard. Had a frustrating time trying to change my Compuserve connection to 28,800 baud; their helpline was permanently engaged.

Got all the necessary details about paying for the Effolk course. Only need the cash now. Drew up a detailed chart of the homeward bus/train connections to go with the outward one: latest I can leave campus is on the 10.35 bus, which gives me a 12-minute margin for the 11.07 last train.

Watched The X-Files on T's recommendation: gruesome, like a particularly nasty 70's Dr Who, but interesting.

Day 1242

Ten years since the start of the sixth form.

In the afternoon went out to Dulchester with C to have a look at the Effolk campus again; noted down bus times. Gave him advice on dedicated word processors at the retail park.

In the evening to the Crown with M, Jo J and E. Finally heard the story they were keeping so secret in August 1993 down the Swan - some stuff about discovering the boys they were with were under 16.

Reading through my diary earlier (to find the date of that occasion down the Swan) I was struck by the continuity between my past feelings and my optimistic moods now. I'd got into a mind-set where the things that happened over the last year were the chimes of doom. Where of course they were in fact events much less traumatic than many that happened to me before. It was the background of not having anything else to think about that made them seem so important. They have to be dumped overboard.

Day 1241

Alliterative date. Heavy rain and thunder all morning left everything looking much greener. Struggled with VC++, made some headway but not much. Read the e-mails T sent me yesterday, sent her a reply. Had another go with the WWW browser, didn't get too far.

Day 1240

Autumn at last. Five weeks till my course starts. Went into town to get course photos taken.

Decided a Visual C++ book would be a legitimate course expense. Accordingly, after getting the shopping in the afternoon (paid by Delta) borrowed mum's car and drove down to PC World and got Inside Visual C++ which I'd borrowed from the library and knew to be useful.

With (comparatively) so little time before the course starts I ought to try and press on and finish the ANSI C book, plus get something more serious done in VC++ - not that my Visual Lunar Lander isn't an achievement.

Day 1239

Last day of summer. Examined the list of books I've been reading in the evenings, some of them over 10 times in the last 4 years.

T got an e-mail message through in the evening and we exchanged messages all afternoon. Sent a Feedback enquiry to Compuserve about the 'Postage due $0.10' that appears on external incoming e-mail.

Had a good read of the Almanac on Microsoft Bookshelf - fascinating, Captain.

Day 1238

Into town with my cashed Giro. Put £25 in the building society, checked the balance at the bank. Wanted to treat myself to a book or something to christen my debit card but couldn't find anywhere that took Visa or Delta.

Heard on John Inverdale on R5 that their fax machine was 'little used' so sent them a fax to welcome him back to the prog. Got thanked on air while I was cooking tea ½ hour later.

Very cold and grey today, practically dark by 8pm. This and other things reminded me strongly of other peaceful times with something to look forward to. I really hope this course goes well. Where was it I read that the lucky man is the one who knows how much to leave to chance?

Day 1237

Found it a bit hard to motivate myself to do anything after the excitement of the weekend. Carried on typing up my Latin notes.

Day 1236

T was pleased I liked After Hours so much: I told her about the Tom & Jerry ep it inversely reminded me of. They gave me a lift to Stratford: I said they should drive me to Mugsborough and let me fall out back outside the DHSS.

Surprisingly the Bank Holiday trains were half-hourly and I was back at Mugsborough station by 3.40. Walked home.

Tested the WWW prog cursorily. T's getting an e-mail address at work, so we can communicate cheaply.

What a wild weekend! And I didn't have to sign on today.

Day 1235

Went out to see Carry On Up The Khyber. Captain Peacock out of Are You Being Served was there. The film was extremely good on the big screen and the audience reaction was a true pleasure, especially during the 'dinner party under fire' scene.

On the way back T got into an altercation with some Church of Islam-type blacksters and she went on and on and on about it on the Tube train.

Later we watched a film called After Hours on telly. It was brilliant. 'Probably get blamed for that.'

Day 1234

The Compuserve Worldwide Web disc arrived, set it aside for when I got back from T's.

Had a good train journey (no more coaches for me) to Stratford.

Day 1233

Went into town, got some cash out from the building society., went into the bank and got them to send me statements monthly instead of yearly.

Day 1232

The thermocouple I ordered yesterday arrived - excellent speed. Got my visual Lunar Lander working, by substituting SendMessage(WM_PAINT) with ::RedrawWindow(). Quite an achievement.

T rang up in the morning to suggest we go and see Carry On Up The Khyber on Sunday, as part of the Barbican C.O. season. Only £4; it is my fave C.O. and I'd love to see it on the big screen.

Day 1231

Was absurdly pleased first thing by the arrival of a TSB 'Bankcard' for me: debit card for Visa & Delta and £100 cheque guarantee card. This puts me back in credit (in that sense) for the first time in nearly 4 years. Went into town and checked my balance (over the counter because not PIN yet). Still £14.99 over what it should be.

Used the card in the afternoon to order a new thermocouple for my multimeter over the modem from Maplin. Phoned up Compuserve to ask for their free Internet access discs. They've changed their prices: instead of paying 3p/min for extended services, you get 5 hours' free access to everything for your £6.50, after which everything costs you. Since I've only been on for 5½ hours in nearly 2 months, that suits me fine.

Cooked egg and chips for tea, watched Star Trek: TNG 'Rascals', very funny, as good as the Mintaka ep.

Day 1230

Studied Visual C++ again - it's a struggle. Did more scans; beginning to appreciate the capabilities of that Corel PhotoPaint.

In the afternoon, for some reason looked through my diary for 1989, making some interesting new conclusions. I didn't go on the slide in early October when J chucked me, but much later, about the beginning of November. 'Those who do not understand the past are condemned to relive it'.

S rang up about noon and sent me a 3-page fax about UFOs. In the evening clocked Mir again, twice; had a good look at Hercules and Corona Borealis which I'm trying to learn as summer constellations.

Day 1229

A good day. Went to the bank to try and resolve the cheque card request. I immediately saw a woman who stated she could make a check on what I could be offered. Two minutes of small talk later the details came up on the terminal: I could be offered a personal loan, a cheque card, Visa or Access! Their credit-checking must be crap, even though I was listed as 'not working'. Then again, I have had the account over nine years and never been overdrawn, even if it did have 6p in it from 1987-1994. I was very pleased, especially when she told me I could use the card for cash at Midland machines, which should be OK for the Effolk campus.
I thanked her and left, annoyed by the thought that (presumably) any time over the last year (at least) I could have walked into the bank and asked for any of those things.

Came back, experimented with Corel Mosaic. D rang up to say he'd had a bailiff's letter saying he'd 'been officially declared a cunt' and must pay up or have his stuff seized.

Did some trial 256-greyscale scans in the evening, found 100dpi about the best the paper resolution of a glossy like Good Housekeeping was up to: also found the files excessively big.

Went round to M's watched the space station Mir (='peace') pass overhead. Damp smell outside, rain forecast for the holiday weekend.

Got a lot done today eh?

Day 1228

After tea M came round to borrow my serial cable. Made her wait while I taped Country House off the Top 40. She pointed out I didn't need to wait for her to turn up at my house before thinking of going round to hers. It's an interesting friendship I have with M: starting in 1987. She's been an invaluable friend - look how things dropped off in September 1993 when she went to Newcastle.

Day 1227

Seven years since I got my A-level results.

Made big strides with my Visual Lunar Lander prog, but then ran into trouble with WM_PAINT and TextOut. Had a look round Compuserve.

Quite a constructive day really. always feel better when I get to 10pm and can think I haven't simply whiled away the time up to then.

Day 1226

Went round to M's in the evening. E's got an impressive collection of Dr Who books - I might get my own by no means slight collection out of the loft at my parents'.

I caused M to laugh by mentioning I thought the party in February was pretty good: 'Hester said it was shit' she said. 'Hester's used to better nights out than I am,' I explained.

Day 1225

Got a letter from T in the morning - as I suspected, the trip is off (I'd've liked to be told earlier).

Day 1224

Dreamt that my brother had invited Gerry Adams and Martin McGuinness round, and G.A. reacted badly to a facetious remark of mine; then I heard them all talking about me behind my back. It was terrible.

New green carpet laid in the afternoon. With the yellow walls it's quite a transformation.

Fish & chips for tea owing to general disorganisation; forgot to watch Star Trek TNG.

In a way this decorating has been helpfully symbolic of the transformation I hope to achieve from being unemployed to being a top computer studies student. I know the concept is so strange as hardly to be believable, but seven years ago (the A-level results come out tomorrow, so it must be the weekday equivalent of when I got my results on Aug. 19 1988) I didn't know what to expect either at Lowlands.

I've also thought of why I'm so afraid of being contradicted by tragic irony whenever I start feeling happy: just before the end of ABC last year I made some ill-fated remark to W about having settled in enough to feel OK about joining in their [standard-issue office] innuendo. It must have been the last thing I said there (apart from 'No') because I got sacked about 2 minutes later, if that. What an experience eh, and enough to make anyone feel in fear of sudden unpleasantness. Now I can view it with a certain degree of equanimity, but it wasn't pleasant.

Wonder where T is btw - she never replied to my fax last Monday and I haven't heard from her for ages. Ah well.

Day 1223

I'm writing this camped out in the lounge surrounded by my possessions after a day's very hard work. I spilt paint everywhere in the bedroom. I had to shift everything, lock, stock and barrel, out of the room to prepare for the replacement carpet. It took 6 hours. I never realised I had so much stuff. I filled 10 carrier bags just with oddments. I did however find an envelope labelled 'The second weekend fund' with a fiver in it, so something good came out of it.

Day 1222

Went and signed on. Two more to go, and four weeks till the next one because of the Bank Holiday. Got a Modula-2 book from the library and a new Visual C++ book. Came back and worked on a visual Lunar Lander to keep my hand in.

In the evening watched a very poor pilot episode of David Croft's latest effort, Oh Dr Beeching. It really was crap. Croft & Perry had their last decent prog with Hi-de-hi, and that was crap after Simon Cadell left.

Day 1221

More Pascal. Drew up a massive chart to structure my use of time over the next 54 days. Felt buoyed up by the Effolk stuff that came on Friday; I think I've realised that the time of having very little to look forward to is over.

Day 1220

Did some ANSI C, listened to a fairly good version of the triffic The Third-Rate Genie kids' book by Robert Leeson on R4. Got my hard disc working! I looked through a lot of stuff on Compuserve for inspiration. Rather worrying inconsistencies in their charges which I must investigate, btw.

Started writing an abstraction for file lists in Quick C, and also tried out the abstraction concept in Pascal (it worked).

Drew up a new chart for the wait. Now I can definitely claim income support till Thu.Oct.5th. Because on the Friday I won't be actively seeking work and there's fuck all the DHSS can do about it. Better not write anything on the UB40 when I send it back, anything funny I mean, as employment may not be instant in 1996.

I know I'm going to Effolk primarily to improve my prospects but I hope something social comes out of it. I'd better not resent having to be off campus by 10.15pm at the very latest.

That reminds me, I've got to try and persuade the bank to give me a cheque guarantee card. I doubt if either the TSB or the building society'll have a cash machine on campus.

Day 1219

A load of stuff from Effolk arrived; I've got to register at 9 am on October 6th, then there's 6 hours' hanging about till the postgraduate meeting at 4 pm and the 'party' at 5pm. I could take a library tour or something to while away the time (mindful of previous frustrations I intend to make a thorough tour of the place). Also it adds 2 days to the wait, so back to 56 days (8 weeks).

Did a few computer experiments. Went round to my parents' and cooked a quiche for a dinner party they're having tomorrow.

Day 1218

Good progress with Visual C++ - nearly worked out how to have a program just display a message box, then terminate.
Carried on with the ANSI C examples, out of a sense of duty more than much else - this linked list stuff is less than interesting. It is a good book though in the way it develops C++ concepts in C. Though I ought to remember what that bloke at Effolk said about C - I ought to brush up on my Pascal and Modula-2. Wish I could get the hard disc on my own computer working again.

Day 1217

The replacement PsiWin discs came this morning, less than 48 hours after I'd returned the other ones. Not bad at all! Installed it, found it pretty good.

Typed in some ANSI C examples to sort out this linked list stuff. Can't quite sort out the Psion horizon-to-equatorial prog.

Ought to mention I got George Orwell's essays out of the library: very interesting and a good antidote to worry.

Day 1216

Did some C++ experiments. Looked at the samples (I want to find the most minimal Windows app possible and work up from there). Wrote a Psion prog to convert horizon to equatorial co-ords, so I can identify what I'm looking at in the sky.

Day 1215

Sent back the defective Psion discs. Phoned the bank to find that the Greenpeace collection cheque had gone through. That was odd as I was convinced I hadn't sent it. So where has the extra £14.99 in my account come from?

Sent a fax to T to see if she's sorted out the holiday idea yet.

More ANSI C work, got bogged down in the evening in linked lists (I need to type in the case studies). Perhaps a revision of the Visual C++ might make a nice change

Day 1214

More ANSI C, good progress - and all the 'package' stuff is good C++ object practice.

Day 1213

Dreamt I was wearing naval full-dress uniform and had to cross a choppy channel by a rope-walk. Someone told me it was either that or the subway, and I didn't want to take the latter for fear of violence. I clung on by my fingertips till the stone broke away and I knew I'd have to make the crossing.

Did the exercises to Ch. 15 of the ANSI C - been at that over two months now, done pretty well I reckon. Under two months till Effolk, btw - 60 days.

Went to Sainsburys to restock essential supplies, came back via the fish and chip shop. Spotted the girl behind the counter trying to read my 'Canolbarth America' t-shirt.

Day 1212

Went into town, found £14.99 more in the bank than I expected, couldn't work it out.

More ANSI C. For one of the exercises, adapted the OPL merge-two-sorted-files prog I did two months ago (is it really that long?) for the Computer Science book.

Watched Punt & Dennis - good in parts.

Day 1211

More ANSI C. Very little of note happened today, really. This summer's rather reminiscent of 1988, waiting to go to uni. Wish I could engage a bit more with the Effolk idea, though I suppose all that unemployment takes time to wear off. I had no idea what to expect at Lowlands either.

But I do know I'm being offered a massive second chance, an opportunity to end stagnation and start again. It'll call for application too, but no more than I can cope with. (As the ANSI C and Visual C++ work proves).

Day 1210

Cashed my giro, rode into town to the library. More ANSI C, some progress.

Watched Star Trek: TNG Relics, with Scotty - very good with a 'hologram' recreation of the bridge of the proper Enterprise.

Thought the computer had fucked up in the evening as it was refusing to boot; I checked the CMOS setup and found it'd forgotten the hard disc details. Bit of a scare there.

Day 1209

More ANSI C; some knotty problems with C modular compilation imitating C++ objects, solved them so far.

Day 1208

Went down to the Jobcentre to sign on - no trouble. Went to the library, looked up the Carry Ons in Halliwell's film guide, made a list of dates and casts (had to go and buy a biro - lack of foresight).

More ANSI C, wrote my first variable-arguments function - worked first time!

Went round to see my parents: those calendulae down the side of the garage coming on well, nice golden flowers.

Watched a prog about catalogue shopping in the evening: don't expect my order at least till Friday, more probably next week.

Day 1207

Did a spot of ANSI C; must do a bit of Visual C++ revision or I'll forget all that complex stuff.

There was an article about the Carry On films in the paper; from it I compiled a list of all 29 genuine films (and Columbus).

Got to sign on tomorrow, how exciting eh?

Day 1206

Had a sale promotion from Kays, so 'got' a nice pair of branded (never order anything unbranded over £15 from a catalogue) boots for £32.

More ANSI C, good progress. Had to re-install Microsoft Golf due to a runaway QuickWin prog.

Watched an old Minder as part of Channel 4's 'Vintage Thames' thing. Not often I watch Channel 4, especially after last night's chance viewing of Ellen where burglary was treated as un-American. Surely crime is the purest expression of the market 'ethic' the stupid bastards worship so much, if reports can be believed.

Day 1205

Into town, looked in at the Jobcentre and the library. (In future, assume I did Mon, Wed, Fri unless I say so - who am I talking to?)

Did some solid ANSI C work.

Watched Punt & Dennis and Alexei Sayle in the evening. Changed the background sounds in MS Golf to the Carry On clips I managed to digitise after all that work yesterday.

Listened to Tony Benn's diaries on R4: was he being paranoid or was there anything behind it?

Day 1204

Grey, hot and humid, not too pleasant. Went out for a bike ride to clear my head after last night and to measure how far we walked last night. Ironically, got a flat tyre, had to walk all the way back from M's new place.

T rang up in the afternoon, had a good talk; she sent me a test fax - worked well.

Spent the rest of the afternoon trying to record some Carry On catchphrases I'd taped as .WAV files - traced the problem to a faulty ¼"-to-3.5mm jack adaptor. But I did work out how to tape in stereo from a SCART socket.

Pris later. Wonder how the by-election'll go?

Day 1203

Went to the Jobcentre and the bank and finally put in T's 50p lottery cheque. Good thunderstorm about midday, some very loud thunder and heavy rain. Got very dark.

Worked at ANSI C; prepared tea (cold pie and salad, as the thunderstorm failed to cool things down - lovely) and ate it with Man Of The People, the Star Trek: TNG ep where Deanna Troi was simultaneously afflicted with nyphomania and rapid aging. (!)

M rang up about 7.45 and told me she'd moved. She came round and gave me a lift to have a good look at the place. Very mature this mortgage and flat stuff, I'd better catch up. She was obviously proud of the place and for a fact it was compact but nice.

We set off for the Green Man (M admitted she'd kept that dark as she knew if she'd said so I wouldn't've come) about nine and got there half an hour later after a strange dim summer-evening walk along a new cycle path, 'liable to flooding' as the signs declared, through the fields between the water meadow and the bridge.

At the pub met Jo Jones and Harriet, then had a long, intense conversation with M about everything from Tony Blair and Kenneth Clarke to the housing market and human racial history and differentiation. Best talk and evening I've had in ages.

The guy who used to keep the bookstall at Lowlands popped up again yesterday, on the letters page of the Guardian this time - that's 3 times now, with his two R5 phone-in calls. About the Internet this time and very true. Must tell T.

Day 1202

Finished the C++ book! Over 60 pages of notes. Did it in two weeks too, not bad. Accordingly resumed the ANSI C book.

Those things I planted down the side of my parents' garage, calendulae I think, are coming along very well. One's flowered.

Must take those cheques to the bank tomorrow.

Day 1201

Got a lift into town for an early look in at the Jobcentre, walked back. Much C++ work, nearly finished the book. And when I do, there's the ANSI C book to get back to... Hopefully I can spin this out for the rest of the 72 days before Effolk. I've learnt tons.

Got a reply to my reply on Compuserve - nice to discuss this stuff with someone for a change.

Assume the TSB have accepted the direct debit for Compuserve? It's nearly four weeks now. More importantly, is £6.50 a month worth it? It's £1.60 a week, the cost of a week's tabloid papers - good value. 20 minutes' forum access a week is £1 extra, makes it £2.60; the Guardian and Independent On Sunday for a week cost £4.15, so that puts us up to 50 minutes' forum access - gets better value the more I consider it. Must make sure I've got cash in the bank to cover, though - £35 at the weekend so no trouble.

Watched Panorama about Temazepam abuse.

Day 1200

Lots more C++ work - on Ch. 20 now. Success too with my own 'proper Windows' app - it wasn't working yesterday because of missing capital letters. Because it was a run-time problem no compile or link errors were flagged, but nothing happened when the app ran. Sorted it now though.

A good day.

Day 1199

Got straight on with the C++. Can't get my first home-made proper Windows prog to work though. Why?

Checked the SF lit. forum on Compuserve, found out that Jack Vance is now almost blind and uses a computer with voice recognition. Apparently he wants his books to be judged by themselves and doesn't want his personal life discussed. Anyway, the bloke who posted that message speculated about JV's politics. I was interested as it's something I've often speculated on myself, so I composed a rumination about it and sent it in the evening (18 seconds - not bad).

Day 1198

Went into town to the Jobcentre and the library, nothing spectacular. Much very hard work on the 'Learn C++ in 21 days' book - I've got to take it back on the 31st so I should just make it. It's typing in the example listings that takes the time, but you can't have anything better to aid understanding of a language than an example prog. Over 50 pages of narrow feint notes so far too - very hard work, as I said.

Day 1197

More very hard C++ work, also carried on with a little project of my own for purging all those files C++ creates, with good progress so far.

Catalogue order came about noon: shorts good but had to go out in the afternoon to return the boots as one had a staple sticking out of the sole.

Just heard O.J. Simpson's wife was white - I'd assumed all along she was black, like him. Wonder if that'll change my attitude? Mind you, I was already sure he was [affected by subsequent court decision].

Day 1196

Very humid and unpleasant. More C++; hope I can finish the book before I have to take it back to the library.

Watched the last Blackadder Goes Forth - very touching.

Eleven weeks till Effolk. I'm a bit worried about what it'll actually be like, whether there'll be seminars etc. Can't say I remember worrying about that before Lowlands. But my C++ studies have reassured me about whether I'll be up to the course - it's difficult to assimilate sometimes but I'm making progress.

Day 1195

More C++; the real work is typing in the example listings. Difficult concepts but manageable. Cooked tea, watched The Bill, checked my thread on CompuServe.

Day 1194

Went to sign on - no trouble at all, only waited about 2 minutes.

Put in lots of hard work on the C++. M rang up in the evening with a query about the tube from Ongar (she's trying to avoid the rail strike tomorrow).

Day 1193

Still more C++ - hard to grasp sometimes but very interesting. Reorganised the computer room, rode down to Homebase for a phone socket doubler so I can have the phone and modem plugged in at the same time.

Day 1192

More C++ notes and test programs - made progress, but it's very complicated. Played a good game, World Empire, I got from the Windows Shareware book; listened to R4 play about Live Aid (10 years ago this week).

I got that X-Files ep guide T wanted from Compuserve yesterday, but it's very big and could be troublesome to fax or post. I'll ask her if she wants a condensed versh.

Had a letter at midday in response to my fax to the letters page in the week about the repeat of last year's Doonesbury: a mistake by the syndicators, apparently.

Day 1191

Worked extremely hard on the first Windows chapter of the C++ book, took 12 pages of notes. Sent T a fax at her work. She rang in the afternoon to acknowledge receipt.

Day 1190

Hard work all day on the C++. T rang up during the day to request X-Files info from Compuserve.

In the evening watched the last in the series of Men Behaving Badly. Since the last ep of the last series (the one I watched at T's) it's been really good. As C said, unusual for a series to improve so late on.

Btw, that rumour that a fifth Blackadder was planned, set in the 60's was true, though the plan's been abandoned: it was to revolve around a group called The Blackadder Five with Baldrick as the drummer, but the actors got too famous and gave up the idea.

Thursday Pris again. Must say I'm surprised to see it back - not complaining though.

Day 1189

Went to the Jobcentre, can confirm a proper waiting system is in place. May mean a longer wait but will eliminate the hassle.

The Psion Windows link stuff I ordered arrived. Worked very hard at the C++, made good progress.

Watched that Sid James doc.

Day 1188

Worked very hard on the C++ book, reached a block in the afternoon which I'm still puzzling over.

Day 1187

Extremely hot. Into town in the morning, found exactly the right Visual C++ book. Studied most of the day, exercised.

Got replies to my Quantum Leap and Vance/Roddenberry questions - not much support for my theories on either.

Day 1186

Extremely hot today. More Visual Basic for Applications experiments.

M rang up while I was eating tea to suggest an experiment; after a few false starts got a connection and conversed.

Day 1185

Didn't wake up till 11.45; did some successful work with Excel Visual Basic. Went out, got a couple of magazines with free CD-ROMs. Experimented with those, watched the Lottery draw (not a single number for our syndicate) and Saturday Night Armistice (good in parts).

Day 1184

More computing - cautious experiments with Visual C++. There was a letter in the morning from Effollk confirming my place - sent an e-mail to ask about finance details. My first experiment with Internet e-mail - hope it works.

A letter from T arrived, she seems pretty positive.

Rang DCA, spoke to that American woman: needless to say there's no 'DCA Communications'.

Had a peaceful evening watering plants and watching The Bill and Alexei Sayle.

Day 1183

Term only finished four years ago and already I'm bored. Yes, four years since I left Eastchester. Also only 90 days till Effolk.

Took the collection to the bank, looked in at the Jobcentre where everything had been rearranged. It might just be possible the no-queue signing on might be over! Wonder if it's anything to do with Portillo being kicked out of Employment? Greasy bastard.

Got on with the ANSI C, made good progress. Discovered that Visual C++ can also function as C with the Windows software developer's kit. If only I knew where to start!

In the evening a peculiar phone call from someone claiming to work for 'Communications' in DCA, although they didn't know what DCA stood for and had to ask, saying was this the address to forward a letter for D?

Discovered by chance that Pris is on tonight! If it's a return to twice-a-week we could see the end of it in anything from 4 months to a year.

Day 1182

Cashed my Giro, went over to the building society near Asda to deposit £25.

Made notes on C/C++ differences, all very interesting. Went out at 6.30 for the Greenpeace collection, from 80 houses got 30 responses totalling £15.77, including 2 people who put their name and address in the box for information. Given that I've been worrying about it for 3½ months, ever since I agreed to do it, it all went very well.

Did some ANSI C on the 486, was hampered by different .MAK file arrangements. (The C++ functions as C as well).

Day 1181

Four years since I graduated. Did some constructive C and a spot of C++ experimentation.

Got onto Compuserve in the evening an downloaded a couple of Quantum Leap .WAV files; set up Windows to play the leap sound effect at entry and exit. Politely declined a conference session with some bloke, citing my phone bill.

Unaccountable scanner problems on the 486, scans coming out all black. Better with my old scanner on the Amstrad - using the new device driver I downloaded, 300dpi scans of great length were possible with no trouble.

Day 1180

Mum let me borrow her car, so drove down to sign on in fine style. No trouble, out by 10.10; four more to go.

While I was working on my parents' computer Miss Foxberrow, headmistress of my primary school, rang up to speak to dad (she's in the same choir) and we had a long talk about unemployment and courses. I told her M, who she remembered, had put me on to the course idea and had done pretty well out of it herself.

Did some fine greyscale test scans; the 400dpi ones are good but frighteningly large. Studied the C++ book along the way - fascinating; must take some notes and try the examples. I ought to carry on with the ANSI C book some time too.

Quite a good, hard-working day really.

Day 1179

Went down to Lakeside, got a 256-grayscale scanner. Got it back, fitted it, worked like a dream after I changed the IRQ from 11 to 7.

Got to sign on tomorrow (5 to go) but no point thinking about it now, it's worse than actually going.

Day 1178

Cloudy when I woke up at eleven after a much-needed 9 hours' sleep. Did some computing, investigated picture downloads - judging by the file descriptions some of the stuff is well dodgy. Keep away.

After dinner went and did the shopping, read the CompuServe book and a C++ book. Interesting language.

Distributed the Greenpeace envelopes after tea; clouds had gone in the afternoon and it was a pleasant evening.

Day 1177

Enormous wait for the coach back, appalling traffic in Leyton High Rd, long journey back via M11 and A414. In future I might get the coach there and the train back.

Day 1176

Went into town for a coach ticket in the morning, came back and pottered around testing computer stuff, left at three.

Day 1175

Four years since the last 'official' day of term at Lowlands. Fiercely hot today; up early, got the back off the computer and fitted the scanner card, but try as I might I could not get the bloody thing to work. Even downloaded advice from the Logitech forum on Compuserve could not help.

T rang up in the afternoon to say D had returned and that there'd be a reunion at hers tomorrow. Went into town very fast to try for a coach ticket but the office had already closed, so enquired at the station instead (£12 there and back - ouch). Will go into town early tomorrow to see if I can get a coach ticket and to visit the building society for funds.
Gave D a ring to say I'd be coming, she said it'd make the occasion 'perfect'. It should be quite good.

Computer-wise a frustrating day but I did get Visual C++ installed (you can use it just as a C compiler if you wish).

Watched Blackadder Goes Forth - too much 'the ___est ___ since ___'.

Day 1174

Went into town for blank discs for backup purposes. New computer for my course arrived in the afternoon. Encarta very impressive (coverage a bit limited though). Used my free Compuserve trial, billed it to direct debit. £6.50 a month. Downloaded this afternoon's European satellite picture and some news about the betting on the Tory leadership from for practice.

On the latter, surely excessive right-wingery won't win them the next election? Surely people have had enough of all that nonsense? Let's hope so.

Day 1173

My parents kindly gave me the money to buy a new computer for my course. Went to the computer shop and ordered a 486dx4, 100 MHz, 8M RAM, 560MB hard disc, quad speed CD ROM, Sound Blaster, 28.8k modem - fantastic! Might even be able to get Visual C++. That hould really liven up the last 100 days of the Unemployed Era. But all the more reason to work very hard at Effolk.

Major has been challenged for the leadership by John Redwood, Romulan and arch-[referent still alive]. Can hardly decide which of them is worse. Wonder what'll happen?

Day 1172

Read the Australia book, the papers etc. Plodded on with the ANSI C; got rather bogged down with a Julian date question, might substitute the routines from my Pascal ephemeris as the thrust of the exercise is about modular programming, not learning about leap year calculations.

Day 1171

Went down to PC World to compare software prices.

Day 1170

Went to town, got a great book from the library about Australian convict settlements. Did some more ANSI C, finished the letter to T.

Douglas Hurd announced his retirement today - always found him almost likeable, a bit like Ted Heath. What is going to happen?

Day 1169

Copied out all the flower meanings from the book I bought for mum yesterday, stored them in dBase III.

M rang up about 8.15 and we went to the Cricketers. It's nice to have her back round here.

But the news of the day: at 5pm heard John Major's boring nasal voice stating he was resigning as Tory leader and would seek re-election! I reckon probably no-one will stand against him, unless some stalking-horse causes a lot of abstentions in the first round. It could be good or bad, I'm sure Tony Blair can find the right angle. Portillo is the obvious danger but my instinct is that the Tories have lost support by being too right-wing and not too left-wing, so he might not do them any favours. If only Major could be tricked into holding a general election.